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I attended the 9:30 am session, led by Coach Deborah and also attended by Alexus and Kelly-May. For the first time in as long as I can remember, I was anxious about today’s metcon. Will I be able to complete burpee pull-overs? If so, will I be able to do so for 20 minutes? Will I chafe? If so, how badly?

I had completed about 5 burpee pull-overs on Sunday. I was going to have to do many more than that today. 

CD reviewed the workout and then asked if I’d like to demo a burpee pull-over. I replied, “I’m saving all of my reps for the metcon.” Because I was. I had, however, demonstrated a burpee pull-up for the 6 am athletes by request of Miss Holly. I hadn’t, however, applied Bodglide, and that one and only rep left a mark. 

A: Metcon (AMRAP – Rounds and Reps)

20-min AMRAP

10 burpee pull-overs
30 air squats
60 seconds of handstand hold

I did slather Bodyglide around my waist. I’m glad that I did.

The clock counted down and my heart began to race. “Three, two, one, go!” And I rather easily completed about 4 or 5 burpee pull-overs. I did, however, get what can only be described as “stuck” on one of the latter reps of the round, i.e., the upper half of my body made it over the bar but the lower half of my body wasn’t moving. Dammit. I reminded myself that I didn’t have to redo the burpee. I did manage to complete all 10 reps. As I was completing air squats I yelled, “You two are crushing me, Alexus and Kelly-May!” ‘Twas the truth. I held the handstand for 1 minute, moved a poker chip, and began the second round.

Uhm, and the second round was my worst round. I got “stuck” on two reps, and began to doubt that I’d even be able to finish the metcon as prescribed. I was filled with self doubt. Me? Yup, me. I’m allowed. Bitches. Midway through the round of burpee pull-ups I had gotten CD’s attention and asked her to record my burpee pull-ups. She said, “I can never remember your code. What is it?” Suffice it to say that my code has both the numerals “4” and “5.” I told her the code and then thought, Shit. Was I on rep 4 or 5? Shit, that means I’m on rep 4. Shit, shit, shit. Yup, I thought that. Shit, shit, shit. Another 30 unbroken air squats (easily the easiest of the three activities), and a handstand held in increments of 40 and 20 seconds. I once again moved a poker chip and began the third round.

And things finally clicked. I didn’t get “stuck” once. Yay! Deborah once again asked for my code so that she could record me, I gave her the code and then once again thought, Shit, am I on rep 4 or 5? Shit, shit, shit. That means I’m on rep 4. Thirty unbroken air squats and handstand held in increments of 30 and 30 seconds. Poker chip, fourth round. I also yelled, “Kelly-May and Alexus, today is a day that you should be happy that you don’t have a penis. I keep hitting mine on the bar.” And I did. Next time I’ll remember to wear a cup. 

I had really gotten into my groove, and the fourth round of burpee pull-ups was perhaps my best. Whilst completing 30 unbroken air squats I thought, “Well at least I won’t have to do any more of these.” I was wrong. Handstand in increments of 40 and 20 seconds, poker chip, and the start of the fifth round.

I completed 10 burpee pull-ups, often resting a brief moment between reps to shake out my arms. CD yelled, “Thirty seconds!” just as I was beginning 30 air squats. I had completed 14 when she yelled, “Fifteen seconds!” I picked up the pace. She counted down from 3 and I counted up to 30. I had squatted below parallel and risen hallway when the clock beeped. Dammit, one rep shy of 30. 

Score = 4 rounds + 39 reps. Rx, yo. 

B: Bent Over Row (5-5-5-5-5)

Work up to heaviest set of 5 reps.

What, strength after conditioning? Why, yes! I warmed up with 95, and then completed a set at 135. I felt strong today, so I made an on-the-spot goal to do 5 reps at 200#. I completed sets at 165, 185, and then 200#. Goal achieved. I thought, Go for it. Put another 10 pounds on the bar. Even if you can’t complete all reps you still will have achieved your goal. 

CD watched as I began. Uhm, the first rep didn’t count, as the bar didn’t make contact with my body. I didn’t put down the bar but instead completed 5 unbroken reps. When I finished CD said, “But that was 5 reps.” I said, “I know, the first rep didn’t count since the bar didn’t touch my chest, so I didn’t count it. I don’t cheat. And I don’t count bad reps.” 

I know with certainty that I’ve ever completed bent over rows at or above 200, let alone 5 unbroken reps at 210#. PR, yo. 

‘Twas a very good day. 

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