I’m beginning to think that Josh and I have a similar sense of humor.

I was the first (as usual) to arrive at CFBC. For the first time that I can recall, I did not know what the workout was going to be, as I intentionally didn’t check the website and/or Facebook. Thus, I didn’t know what to expect. Josh was writing the workout on the board, and had only written 25 toes to bar and 50 walking lunges. I thought, This could get interesting… I had planned on stretching my shoulders, as they are sore, sore, sore. I instead spent that time searching for my left shoe, jump rope, and Band-Aids. I then warned Josh that my double unders are, for lack of a better word, “unusual”. He observed and said, “Not only do you only move the rope using your right hand, but your right arm is extended much farther out than your left arm.” You have keen observational skills, Josh. I replied, “As long as the rope goes under my feet two times it counts.”

We began the warm-up with a 400m run. I heard much plodding, but I kept my big mouth shut. Josh then led us through a variety of 30-second warm-up activities, including pushups, air squats, arms swings, quad stretches, and burpees. Uhm, doing burpees on concrete will wake up a body fast.

Josh next described and demonstrated the movement requirements and scaling options for the chipper, and instructed us to set up our stations and complete 5 or so reps of all activities.

Just before we were to begin I asked Josh, “Are you going to call out to us?” He said, “What’s coming up next or call out to you, Paul? I can say, ‘Do better, Paul’ or ‘Do that last thing better than before’” Ha!

Someone asked, “How long should this take?” Josh answered, “Maybe 10 minutes or less.” There was much grumbling and guffawing. Josh then said, “It should take less than 20 minutes.”

For Time:

  • 25 Toes to Bar
  • 50 Walking Lunges
  • 75 Kettlebell Swings (53/35)
  • 100 Meter Sandbag Carry (50,25)
  • 75 Double Unders
  • 50 Pushups
  • 25 Wall Balls (20,14)

I completed 25 unbroken and kipping toes to bar. Uhm, I didn’t know that I had it in me. I then completed 50 walking lunges (25 each leg), ensuring that front knee was over ankle and that back knee touched the floor. I stayed on the mats and avoided the concrete. Because I’m smart.

I completed KB swings in a set of 15 and then remaining sets of 10. Each time I set down the KB I glanced at the others. Eric seemed to always be swinging the KB, and I thought for sure that he was doing 75 unbroken. I mentioned this to him later and he said, “Every time I looked in your direction you were swinging the kettle bell. I thought the very same thing.” I like a little friendly competition.

My arms were getting tired. I was getting confused, though, and often had to ask what was coming next.

The 100m sandbag carry was a delight, and I only wish the distance had been 200m. Or 400m. Or 800m. Or a mile.

I completed double unders in reps of 50, 20, & 5. As I stopped after 50 and missed the 21st attempt, I only had 1 failed rep (that I of course didn’t count).

Pushups after double unders? That’s just cruel. I completed in reps of 10, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 5, 3, & 2. That’s much time spent in child’s pose and/or shaking out the shoulders.

Wall balls after double unders and pushups? That’s just torture.

I picked up the wall ball, squatted, and attempted to hit the target and the wall. I missed on both accounts, and Josh witnessed. I thought, Shit, I’m going to be here for quite some time. And I was right. At the most I was able to complete 5 unbroken wall balls, but I usually completed in sets of just 3. One shot, 2 shots, 3 shots, THUD. One shot, 2 shots, 3 shots, THUD. I missed 4 wall ball shots out of the 25.

To make matters humorously worse, Josh seemed to be all up in my business. “Use your hips, Paul!” “Dig deep, Paul.” “You’re doing this ‘Rick Froning’ time, Paul!” That made me laugh.

I called “Time!” at 12:20, and I’m glad that I did, as I was too spent to even look at the clock.

When all had completed the workout, Josh justifiably said, “See everyone? You all completed in less than 20 minutes. You all did much better than you expected.”

Do you get a sense that I like Josh’s coaching style? I do.

Earlier in the week Deedee sent a message congratulating me on my time for “Badger”. I wasn’t quite sure why she would’ve done this, so I reminded myself to look at the whiteboard and compare my time to others. It appears that I had the fastest time of the day. Josh saw me looking at the times and said, “The running did me in. You beat everyone on the run.” Josh, I can make you faster. I promise. That goes for you, too, Kirk, Deedee, and Nikki. Hell, I even helped Michael Kelley get fatter. And faster.

I’ll be guest coaching the 5, 6, & 7pm sessions at CFBC this coming Tuesday. Be there. I mean it.

Luke is spending the day at You Lucky Dog. I was able to workout, shower, drop off Luke at daycare, get breakfast from Panera, and be at work by 7:35. Talk about convenient!


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