Regression. That’s the opposite of progression.

Jack was kind enough to allow me to coach the 6:15 session as he prepared for a trial. I agreed to do so more as a favor to Dori, as she’s my favorite Wiggen.

There were but a handful in attendance today, include Alma, Brandon (who did yesterday’s WOD), Griff, Young Nick, Paul K. (you can read his take on today’s festivities here), and Griff Max, who arrived late. I set the timer, and CFers completed 1 minute of single unders, 1 minute of jumping rope sprints, 1 minute of double unders, a 2-minute squat, and 1 minute of single unders.

Young Nick moves his arms wildly while completing double unders, and I commented, “You look like a flightless waterfowl attempting to take flight.” Sometimes you just have to save the first thought that comes to your mind.

We next warmed up the dead-lift, focusing on form, and then CFers completed 5-5-5-5-5 reps (roughly 50, 60, 70, 75, and between 80 and 85% of 1RM). The met-con was challenging. More in a moment…

I attended the 5pm session, led by Dave, and it was a full house! Dave had us warm up by doing 3 sets of overhead squats while holding a light kettle bell in one hand above our head, then the same with the other hand, then 15 kettle bells swings. Jack looked somewhat tired, and I commented, “Jack asks for a continuance.” Dave replied, “I’m requesting a gag order.” I didn’t miss a beat and replied, “That’s what she said.”

Matt was kind enough to ask me to partner with him for the dead-lifts, and as I’m not supposed to be lifting heavy this week, this worked out well. (Thanks for asking me to join you, Matt!) We based lifts on 295 lb, and we both lifted 5 sets of 145, 175, 205, and 245. All lifts felt very solid.

Next was the dreaded met-con. As it included OHS, I knew I had to do it. It was in many regards a colossal failure, and I blame Michael Kelley Jack.

50-40-30-20-10 double unders
20-15-20-5 OHS (105/65)

I settled on 73 lb (I had to use 43 lb bar as all 45 lb bars were taken). I placed a medicine ball on the floor to ensure that I squatted deeply enough. What I failed to do, however, was remind myself what I’ve learned about OHS. Push my ass back before squatting! Keep the bar back! Squat deeply!

On a positive note, I completed rounds of 50, 30, and 20 dus unbroken, and round of 4o in reps of 25 and 15. I completely lost focus on the last round of 10.

On a very negative side, my overhead squat form sucks. Dave was on me like white on rice. “Touch the ball, Paul.” “That rep didn’t count.” “Squat completely, Paul.” At one point I yelled, “Help someone else, Dave!”

I completed the met-con in 6:46.

I then coached the endurance WOD. We warmed up by running while jumping rope, and then did 100m uphill and downhill reps with 30-sec rest between reps. We also cooled down with a 800m run and conversation.

While preparing to leave, I got Jack’s attention as he was talking with Dave.

Jack: You reverted to your old form for the overhead squats.
Me: What do you mean?
Jack: We were making progress, but you didn’t push your hips back when squatting.
Me: I blame you, Jack. Even though you were doing the met-con, you should have coached me.
Dave: I tried to help.
Me: Yes, Dave, but Jack’s my favorite coach. I listen to his advice.
Jack: You are far too straight. (Referring to my spine and back.)
Me: I hear that all of the time.

Jack: You are too straight.
Me: My husband says that all of the time. Usually when we’re kissing.

As I may have hurt Dave’s feelings by telling him that I didn’t listen to his advice, I said, “Dave, I listen to your advice – your fashion and entertainment advice.” Poor Dave. I texted him later: Your opinion does matter, Dave. I just like to make Jack feel likes him important instead of impotent. Poor Jack.

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