It’ll make a man maker out of you.

Today was a scheduled rest day, and believe me you — I had every intention of resting. Yesterday’s 145 push presses and 87 dead-hang chest to bar pull-ups had done did me in, I tell you. They done did me in and good.

At about 3:30 this afternoon, I received a text from Jack asking if I’d coach tomorrow’s 6:15 am session. Well, if I was going to be coaching tomorrow morning, that meant that it was unlikely that I’d get to work out. I’m good at math, so that meant that I had to go do the WOD today since I wouldn’t get to do a WOD tomorrow. Right? Right?

I worked through lunch so that I could attend the 5pm session feeling free of guilt. And that’s what I did.

Dave led today’s session, and the focus was on the hang clean. I will begrudgingly admit that I like Dave’s warmups, as they are usually focused on the lift. Today was no exception. We grabbed a bar and did numerous squats followed by stretching of the wrists.

Hang Clean
2-2-2-2-2 (0r thereabouts)

I put 2, 25 lb plates on the bar and completed a 95 lb hang clean. Jack, who was participating in the WOD, immediately saw the error in my form, provided coaching, and I had a breakthrough! I had been failing to literally extend my hips and thereby push the bar off of my mid-thighs. I did it on the first attempt, and it felt great! (I have marks on my thighs as proof that the bar did indeed make contact. I kid you not.) I completed about 5 or 6 more 95 lb hang cleans, and requested that both Dave and Jack observe to make sure I was doing lifts correctly. Yes, Dave, I still need to loosen my “death grip”. One thing at a time, Dave.

Jack, thank you once again for your insight. You are my favorite coach. Don’t tell Dave, though.

I put 2, 10 lb plates on the bar and successfully hang cleaned 115 lb 2 times. It felt great. I put 2 more 10 lb plates on the bar and successfully hang cleaned 135 lb. “Dave,” I asked, “may I attempt to hang clean my current one rep maximum for squat clean, 145 lb? That’s my bodyweight.” Dave rolled his eyes and said, “Sure, do whatever you want.”

What follows is my self-talk: Okay, 135 lb. My current 1RM for a squat clean is 145 lb. I need to put 10 lb on the bar. (I walked to the stand of metal plates.) Okay, those are 5 lb plates, and I need 10 lb. Why not just get the bumper plates? (I put 2, 10 lb plates on both ends of the bar.) Whew, 145 lb is how much I weigh. If you fall on your ass, it’s okay.

I went from position 1 to position 2, made sure the bar made contact with my thighs, dropped under the bar, attempted to move my elbows as quickly as I could, freaked out that I had actually hang cleaned 145 lb, and fell on my ass. I stood up and rested for a moment. Jack was looking at me. I steeled myself, walked up to the bar…

…and successfully hang cleaned 145 lb! I was very proud of myself, and Jack, Dave, and Tripp offered their congratulations. Tripp asked, “How much did you lift?” I replied, “145 lb, my bodyweight.” Tripp added the plates and said, “I think that’s 155 lb.” Let’s see, a 45 lb bar + 2, 25 lb plates + 6, 10 lb plates = 155 lb! And that, ladies and gentlemen, is a personal record. Did I mention that I’m good at math?

We then prepared for todays met-con, and it was a doozy.

15-10-5 man makers (40/30 lb)
Perform 50 double unders after each round

Dave reviewed proper form for man makers as I excused myself and peed. When I returned, I grabbed a set of 35 and a set of 27.5 lb dumb bells and placed my jump rope to the side. (I couldn’t find a pair of 30 lb dumb bells.) “Dave,” I said, “can you show us once again how to do a man maker?” Dave did. I asked, “One more time, please, Dave?” And he did. “Dave, will you do a total of 15 man makers so we can see what we might look like after the round of 15?” Dave finally caught on that I was egging him on. Haha!

I did the first round of man makers using the 35 lb dumb bells, and it was tough. I struggled least on the pushups and rows, and most on the thrusters. I was using my arms instead of my legs. I should know better. I completed the first round of double unders in reps of about 35 and 15. I completed 3 more man makers using the 35 lb dumb bells, but on the 4th rep I couldn’t get the dumb bells overhead. I dropped them, picked up the 27.5 lb dumb bells, and performed the squat clean and thruster. I used 27.5 lb dumb bells for the remainder of the met-con.

Somewhere during the round of 10, I said, “Man makers are too damn hard! May I do gay man makers instead?” Dave actually laughed out loud, and I think I heard a chuckle from Jack as well. Dave asked, “What would that involve?” I replied, “I’ll dance, sing, and snap my fingers instead.”

And then it happened. My shirt came off. Yes, I took off my shirt. I had little control in stopping myself. Before I had even realized what had happened I had crossed my arms and pulled the shirt over my head. Those who know me well know that this means the met-con was rough.

I completed 25 double unders, caught my breath, and set my goal to perform an additional 25. I completed 23. I yelled, “Shit!” I then picked up the rope and did the last 2 double unders.

By the way, I completed all reps of double unders starting with a double under, i.e., my first jump is now always a double under. Applause, please.

I struggled through the last 5 man makers, caught my breath, and struggled through the last 50 double unders. I called time at 11:27. This was hardly Rx, but it was one of the most difficult met-cons that I can recall.

I finished my all-too-brief time at CFD coaching the endurance athletes. The rain must have scared most people away, as only Jay, Jack, and Lindsay attended. It was quite enjoyable running in the rain. That is all.

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